What is Love?
Love is buying his favorite gummy worms and a soda before a long snow shift. Love is cleaning off my windows when it’s snowed or icy so I don’t have to do it when I leave for work. Love is sacrificing sleep or time to ourselves when we haven’t had much time together due to busy schedules. Love is getting into a fight, then making up and working through our problems. Love is holding your newborn who passed shortly after birth and deciding right then to never give up on anything. Love is taking a horrible first year of marriage and making your relationship even stronger than you ever could imagined. Ryan and I first started dating in March of 2014, and our first date was quite the memorable one. We went to our favorite Mexican restaurant and were there for over 4 hours, we talked, laughed, watched the St. Louis Blues game, and drank entirely too much. After that it just felt right, we were together 2.5 years before he proposed in quite possibly the cutest way possible. We are hunters and he wrote in a card for me “This buck has found his perfect Doe, Will You Marry Me?”. We got married on our 4th anniversary of dating. March 24th 2019 will be our first year of marriage. In that first year we have had 4 deaths including the death of our daughter Emma Louise. Just two weeks after our wedding, my last living grandparent, my grandma Joyce passed away. Two weeks after that my husband’s grandpa Harry passed away, sadly 3 months after our wedding our baby girl was born and passed the same day on July 5th, 2018. And then in December Ryan’s grandma Helen (Harry’s wife) passed away after a fall that left her paralyzed. Not only did we have to endure such tragic events, but we had fights, we were trying to grieve, and I know at one point we both wanted to give up. But we knew that we couldn’t do that, we couldn’t give up on us because that would be like us giving up on Emma. We haven’t had an easy first year of marriage, but it has been so worth it. We have not only grown closer together, but grown into better people. We look at things differently for sure, and have a different approach when an argument starts. The love we have grown for each other is unbreakable and as crappy as our year was. I am happy it happened, that’s not to say I am happy we lost anyone especially not happy about losing our daughter. But the bond this shitty first year of marriage has brought will only bring better years to come. I can’t wait to see what year two has to bring, we will be getting the results to our genetic testing in the next few weeks and hopefully trying for baby number two. I love you Ryan and I always will. Here’s to 60 more years!
About the Author:
I’m an Angel Momma, married to my best friend and have a huge love for hockey. I love dogs and being outside hunting, fishing or hiking. Wine and tacos make me happy. I live in workout clothes or scrubs. On the weekends you’ll find me out with friends or family, or at home with a good book or movie. I’m super sarcastic, and extroverted but I also like to be by myself. I’ve learned a whole new side of grieving after losing my daughter and I am here to share it with all of you. Blogging has helped express what is going on, how I am feeling and what’s new in my life. I am glad to have started and I hope that you will follow as well.
Katie and I used to work together and we grew to be friends. While Katie and I worked together I got to see her through most of these life altering events that happen to her. She has shown so much strength! Your love story is one I will always remember! I hope your second year of marriage bring you more happiness! ❤️